the domes, casa grande, az

You compel me to

Rote (untitled)

You'd spent summer, light cupping

floorboards dust hairs grass breast, flight

indicates, you say, as if nodding, swimming.

Swimming.

As when you weren't in water and came

and I had my mind on you till I saw your mirror. 

Was drainage, was skiing backwards

backwater, the day before you hair 

dried and the dry lake grows near

Wilcox, near a task laid forth in seeds,

then mud, more mud than seeds. Sort 

of like sorting horses from saddles, 

if we deem it, 

if we like or look like cairns. 

Eh?

Eh he said and she

dreamed eh. It was

like that between them.

Not that his lips dreamed,

not that his dreamed lips 

parted. Eh he'd say

and her dream was eh,

was all eh, all and 

only. Sometimes

a near kiss an almost tide

drawn back withdrawn withdrawing.

Sometimes the hackled wave

raised, drew back its lip, sheered

its teeth, coughed its raw 

guttural. Or

she herself voicing

involuntary eh

his whatever, his 

what-it-is. But 

sometimes his naked eh

with her ah alongside - 

the rocked hulls nudging nuzzling

or was it scraping what

did she care? Would his eh

oh? How fast she'd 

founder, taking on water,

mouth emptying full.

By day she'd hear the air

his syllable, turn 

toward or away, does it

matter? If she said ah

would he dream ah? Oh -

not like that between them. 

--Nathalie Anderson

ARIZONA!

Mt. Lemmon

FUCK YOUTH; YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL

It was like one of those dreams where you're filled with some extravagant feeling you might never have in life, it doesn't even matter what it is, even guilt or dread, and you learn from it what an amazing instrument you are, so to speak, what a power you have to experience beyond anything you might ever actually need.

--Marilynne Robinson, "Gilead"

Distortionist

I can only draw rats. Rat drinking soda, rat
soda flavor not yet sure how that'd sit, plain
with white I know you feel this in certain
landscapes: terror, balustraded the shin of each
stair to your room. We sleep. All I have, both my
names mean rock, you could draw back your lip
and your nails burn as fingertip my shoulder,
bite, this is how it feels it feels if like that
between them

building sickening in came a skink, you, did she
care a whetstone bleat clasping nine of the ten
heads we hold, your chest, sex, starting over we
came this far only nice nice.

He's more NRA than
you, more of a little wicked liquor, hold it whiskey
in your throat a night you willing forget. He is
training. Know. Telling I lie, told the clerk leave it on the
counter paid for I'll be back. We love it in the arms.

Upon a night, she in the other room, really just one
large room, I hope she can't hear it doesn't matter
cold penetrating I hold it, your chest, here we are in
hail, twin tip, my hand, please it think, you will, you voicing,
our hulls barely tipping touched hold on to a crack
shoulder will readjust all so fair, so, know it, much fairer
in morning the mouse leaving his nest by your bed.

FAVORITE THINGS

if only

Updike, DJ Paul, Seth, Loaf & Me

Falling asleep has never struck me as a very natural thing to do. There is a surreal trickiness to traversing that in-between area, when the grip of consciousness is slipping but has not quite let go and curious mutated thoughts pass as normal cogitation unless snapped into clear light by a creaking door, or one's bed partner shifting position on the remarkably noisy sheets. The little fumbling larvae of nonsense that precede dreams' uninhibited butterflies are disastrously exposed to a light they cannot survive, and one must begin again, relaxing the mind into unravelling. Consciousness of the process balks it; the brain, watching itself, will not close its thousand eyes. The brain, circling the cell of wakefulness, panics at the poverty of its domain - these worn-out obsessions, these threadbare word games, these pointless grievances, these picayune plans for tomorrow which yet loom, hours from execution, as unbearably momentous. Life itself, that agitation of electrified molecules, becomes a captivity, a hellish endless churning, in which one is as alone as Satan, twisting and turning and boring a conical hole in the darkness, while on every side the wide world gently, blessedly snores.

--John Updike, from "Falling Asleep Up North"

Now if you warrin and runnin from them three-six niggas This forty-five gon give a reason to sleep, nigga Or bustin massive round some s.k. My last trip to a-t-l I fucked yo cascade Im strippin bitches and ima ball fucker with a limp They call me infer-stripper, sexy, red hoes pimp And quick to sink her on the nigga cause this what its bout We rob that trick and stick his dick off in his fuckin mouth We memphis niggas

--DJ Paul, from "Go to Sleep"

Sleep

Where did I leave that pen I'm stealing it's finally time to write to get a job you know how the sun starts humming and such a lousy prospect cryptogrammic grammar gumming up the gears round these parts we don't know shit. You ain't shit.

If I could wake up and know I'm coming down I know I won't wake up no one wakes up we read about movies rather than watch I want to (watch) write the back of movies you'll feel better. Certain. You need it. You are the worry I move about. The orange shirt I don't have don't hate me don't hurry. You need it. Care in the action such a lousy route through Milwaukee why would I go there I'm such a liar all I know are lies and I know it doesn't even matter I'm just filling in the shell, the fetish of originality, walking in, maybe it won't be a lazy day I will get out and I'm a liar, hear.

Drawing is funner. I'm failing. Feel on purpose. Why won't we ever billow out and get caught in the thin wires left by birds insect trails assisting tit for tat please love me it can't get much lower here than sitting read me a poem about the book I hit my head against last night in your bed. Neither of us ever knew how to sleep.

Horror!

Last night me and Loaf listened to Three 6 Mafia and watched Halloween! 

p.s. We were waaaaaay blazed

Perhaps a collaboration between Mr. Carpenter the composer and the Three 6?